A letter from July 4th, 2024

Dear FutureMe, I can't believe that I'm saying this, but I have a boyfriend.. CAN YOU IMAGINE THAT?! Me neither 😂 We started dating on 15th of June.. That's sooo strange and so unreal actually. And I already.. love him? I haven't said this to him yet, because I'm scared. These are too serious words for me, the most important words in the world actually, so I'm not saying it. I feel it, I want to say it out loud to him (as he already told me, that he loves me), but I just physically can't force myself to pronounce "I love you". Usually I'm good at sharing and expressing my emotions/feelings, but not in this situation.. I feel really calm and safe around him and that's the best feeling ever. But also I have so many fears and thoughts about our future. I leave to Austria soon and what will happen to us? Long distance relationships are extremely hard, can't even imagine how much. And I want him to move to Europe, as I don't want to come back. That's really important for me. Too many questions and no answers