A letter from June 8th, 2023

Dear Gossip Central, For the first time ever I am able to answer most of your previous questions with yeses and maybes. While still pathetic the beard is coming in at a surprisingly good pace, now I do have some constructive criticism on the placement but I hope it’ll spread out a bit over time. Voice is unfortunately much the same, now that your cold is gone it’s just kinda lame, but whatever, eventually. Things are going decently smoothly with the ****, literally everyone knows about it which is bloody hilarious, to think last time you weren’t even considering buying one and here we are! And I do believe we have in fact beaten the sharks! Hopefully! Happy to report that my NHS records have been updated, got that new number and all. Hopefully you’ve got the test results back from the blood test and all that. I’m not gonna ask about exams, because I don’t want to think about it. Instead I will ask how karaoke went, because that’s a more fun topic. So how was Hare Hare Yukai? Did Cliff like his present? Yoshi get drunk? And I really want to hear how the bar crawl went as well! Also placement, hopefully it’s all sorted! And hopefully you’re working at Farnborough, it’d be so nice to be back! I’m happy to report Yoshi is somewhat better. Back on meds, lowered his caffeine intake, realised he’s got an alcohol problem. Wants to fix his diet. All good stuff, now let’s hope he can actually fix it. Of course I’ll be here to offer my services, and I can keep an eye on him over the holiday. By the way how’d things shake out with Mimi? I’m very curious, I mean that date…I’m not even gonna say anything in case I end up showing him these letters at some point. We don’t talk about the date. Also is Alex still dating Joyce? I mean I don’t want to make you depressed so don’t think too hard about it if the answer is yes. And now I need to get back to stats revision, hear from you soon! Best regards, Arlo “realistic ****” Linnard